We’ve been back in Madagascar for eleven days now, I believe, and it’s been quite the eleven days. First I had the jet-lag that just kept on giving. The girls have all been sick and still have lingering coughs. I was also sick and am still coughing enough that my ribs are sore. One piece of our luggage arrived a week (ONE! WEEK!) after we did. There was a cyclone, which gave us days of dreary weather. Next came some political tension/civil unrest stuff, which still isn’t over. We are confined to our compound, unless we’re with a group. That sounds much worse than it is, with the exception that it kinda makes me feel antsy just knowing I’m not supposed to leave. : ) This morning I went out with 8 other MAF staff and volunteers to get groceries. The supermarkets are closed today so we did our shopping in the many small shops along the road...I found almost everything I wanted, but I don’t think I ever got more than 2 things in the same place. :) It was kind of fun, but since I’m still recovering from this sickness it’s really left me exhausted for the rest of the day. Our house still feels un-put-together, our routine is still on trial, the girls haven’t been to school yet because of either sickness or the tension in town. Homeschooling is still in the getting warmed up stage, and it’s a little bit of a shock to us all to see what that feels like again.
All of this is not quite the “welcome home” I was looking forward to. I had big plans of organizing closets as I unpacked the new clothes we brought back, not just unloading stuff and making hasty decisions about which closet to shove it into. I haven’t been able to go to church either Sunday that we’ve been back, which is a giant disappointment. I missed our church more than anything else in Mada while we were away, and I was so looking forward to getting back to it.
I know that this season will pass by. I know that God is faithful and I’ve never looked back on a hard time and saw that He really messed that one up. I know that we have many, many blessings...kids that are not seriously ill, kids that love to play and learn, friends that have welcomed us back lovingly, enough food and clothing and shelter and water to meet our needs. I know.
The hard fact of the matter is that I’m having trouble remembering. It’s been difficult to remember why we’re here.
Last night as I was going to sleep, I was thinking of the lyrics “when sorrows like sea billows roll...” and I had to think to myself, “It’s really not sea billows. Maybe more like a choppy, white-capped lake.” I hope that whether it is sea billows or a few bumps along the way, He will teach me to say “It is well with my soul.”
8 comments:
Thank you for your honesty. It's refreshing, even though I'm discouraged for you. Believe me, I know the feeling of having a chaotic house and it makes everything seem chaotic when things aren't put away. Just remember what you said, you've only been there ELEVEN DAYS. Don't be too hard on yourself for not having things done. We are praying for the unrest there to become REST. And I will now pray that it will be politically, in the city; physically, in your bodies; and spiritually, in your heart. I love you.
I've already been praying for you as you adjust, and I'll keep on doing it.
Thanks for baring your heart. . .I will keep on praying. This whole lice episode left me feeling quite unsettled in my house too. . .I like what you said about this not being sea billows rolling but maybe white capped lake. . .good description and a good perspective. Love you my friend!!
That sounds rough. I wish I could relieve you of those hard things. I really affirm your faith that in retrospect you will see God was still in control, and that he loves you very much. Much love from here, too.
Dad asked if I read your blog today and I hadn't. We'll keep you in our prayers but with a bigger picture in sight.
thanks for sharing. i'll be praying too! peace in your heart, in all of your bodies, and in your city!! love you!
hey there! i hope you all are doing well...or better by now. i'm praying for your safety. i love you.
I too feel for you and will pray with renewed vision, but I have to say that at the moment I'm just terribly excited to be reading your blog (before it's 2 weeks or a month old) fro my own bedrom!!! I'll be sending that email just as soon as we get the whle "back to school" routine figured out too. Grr... It makes me grumpy to have to lower my standards and expectations.
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